What You've Been Looking For
by PurePower
Summary: How did it start? How does it end? How... HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN? ................................ 'I don't know, but... it's what I've been looking for...' ...[[One Shot] with a possible Sequel]


**Author's Corner**

Yeah so… here's a one shot (obviously). Once again, I was possessed and it had to write this the way I did.

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**What You've Been Looking For…**

Deep brown eyes stared up at the shining crescent moon that was the centerpiece of the cool azure sky. Her body of flesh able to sense the chill of the autumn night, and her raven black hair flowed freely behind her, hindered only by her quiver of arrows, as her left hand clutched its counterpart. She refocused on the unclear path before her that led to nowhere in particular, but served as a means of leaving behind the memories and the desecrated ruins of Naraku's last stronghold where he had finally been destroyed for all time. She remembered detesting having to fight beside, or rather along with, so many people, but she realized that victory could only be achieved if they worked together, and so they had. But she had never expected to become an object of interest to Inuyasha's half-brother.

On the few occasions that they journeyed together towards the end, Kikyo had noticed him stare at her fearlessly, as if reading something that only he could see. She was already at unease being around Inuyasha and Kagome at the same time, and the demon Lords' wordless and expressionless staring, only made things worse. She had wondered several times, whether the demon lord felt not the slightest bit of unease when he openly stared at her in front of the monk, the exterminator, the demon child, Rin, the green imp, ….Kagome…….Inuyasha! If anything, he certainly intensified the awkward tension between Inuyasha, Kagome and herself, but she could plainly see that he didn't care in the slightest about what anybody thought, least of all what Inuyasha thought. It was after one occasion such as this, that he did something completely unexpected but not unlike his manner….

…ooOOoo…

"_What do you want from me Sesshoumaru?" Kikyo asked, looking up at the young moon, as she sensed the powerful demon aura behind her. "We are out here alone, so tell me."_

"_What made you presume that I would want anything from one such as yourself?" Sesshoumaru, asked from behind her._

"_Why else do you keep staring at me?" Kikyo retorted in an equally cold tone._

"_I have my reasons," he replied. "None of which I care to explain to you."_

"_Then I kindly ask you to stop staring at me when the others are around," Kikyo said monotonously._

"_By others you mean, Inuyasha," he stated dryly. _

_That caught Kikyo by surprise._

"_What makes you say that Sesshoumaru?" she questioned, turning to look at him._

"_I know of your history," he put simply._

_Kikyo narrowed her eyes._

"_Our history… is in the past, and it is over," Kikyo said this more to herself than the demon she was talking to._

"_Inuyasha doesn't seem to be so sure," he commented, looking up at the dark blue skies._

"_He… he cares for Kagome…" stated Kikyo, not knowing exactly what that meant._

_Sesshoumaru cast her, an odd look. "He cares for you too," he remarked nonchalantly._

_Kikyo lost her patience for the Inu Youkai. "What is the point of this conversation?" she suddenly shouted at him._

_In an instant Kikyo was backed up into a tree, sharp, clawed fingers, holding her firmly around her neck._

"_Do not raise your voice to me you dead bitch!" Sesshoumaru warned calmly._

"_Let me go!" Kikyo shouted, grabbing his left wrist and trying to push him away._

"_I said… no shouting," he re-informed, tightening his grip around her clay neck._

_Kikyo released her grip on his arm, after all she couldn't feel pain, nor did she have to breathe, so he wasn't exactly hurting her, but if he continued increasing pressure, her neck would surely crack._

"_If Inuyasha saw you with your hand on my neck, he will cut off your arm, and you will once again lose it," Kikyo said calmly._

"_What makes you think he is looking for you?" he asked coldly._

_She didn't have an answer._

"_After all, you left camp alone and made sure that he couldn't follow you," he continued. "Or did you want to see whether he could or was still willing to find you?"_

_She looked away from his piercing cold face._

"_You are just as unsure as he is," he stated. "That half breed acts like a lost dog; not knowing who to be faithful to."_

_She said nothing as she looked on at the dark forest._

"_But you can plainly tell that he cares very much for your re-incarnation, perhaps more than you." His words rang loud in her ears._

_Kikyo brought her left arm up to slap him, but he caught it with his other hand and nailed it to the bark of the tree above her head._

"_You bastard! Unhand me!" Kikyo struggled in his grip. "Why are you doing this to me?"_

"_Because you fascinate me," he smirked. "For a human, that is. Or perhaps I like to see you suffer."_

"_You are nothing like Inuyasha," she remarked with a hiss._

_Kikyo was tossed to the ground like a toy._

"_You filthy wench, you would dare compare me to that half breed," he said coolly. "But you are right; I certainly am nothing like him. He is weak, he is powerless without his sword, and he is a fool."_

_Kikyo was barley paying attention to him- her eyes were focused on her bow and arrows that she had placed beside the tree next to her._

"_I think we can manage defeating Naraku, without your help," Kikyo spat out, aiming an arrow at his heart. "I am sure nobody is going to miss you, except for maybe Rin and Jaken. But they will learn to get along fine without you."_

"_You… won't get near Naraku, without my help," Sesshoumaru remarked, his face expressionless. "And you won't return the same way you came, that I can assure you."_

_Enough was said. Kikyo let the arrow fly, purification power glowing with intensity along its length. Kikyo watched as Sesshoumaru pulled out Tenseiga and released a burst of power from it: instantly the arrow was turned to ashes_

_Sesshoumaru smirked in boredom._

_Kikyo kept her gaze on the demon sword that had just incinerated her arrow and destroyed her purification power._

"_Now, to get this over with," Sesshoumaru said, sheathing the glowing blade._

_Kikyo dropped her bow and arrow and began running blindly into the dark forest, hoping that she could make it back to camp, where she might get some protection, where Inuyasha was-_

_Leaves and branches scratched at her face as she made her way through the night forest. Suddenly her foot got caught in an exposed tree root, and she crashed to the cold floor. She looked behind her to see Sesshoumaru standing over her, his eyes narrowed in anger._

"_Did you really think you could escape me?" he asked._

"_Stay away from me Sesshoumaru!" she warned, in vain._

"_I'd rather not," he said, moving forward._

_Kikyo tried to scramble away, but was instantly held firmly against his chest, and then was lifted off into the air._

"_Where are you taking me?" she asked in anger._

_He did not reply, and after a while, she stopped squirming in his grip, and instead watched the top of the forest go by in a blur below her._

"_My body is clay and soil; you won't enjoy trying to sleep with me," she remarked off handedly._

"_What makes you think that this Sesshoumaru would desire a body of clay and soil, when I can have any woman in the land I want?" he asked monotonously._

"_I thought that perhaps, that is what got you off!" she replied in disdain._

_His hold around her middle tightened, almost on the verge of cracking her body in half._

"_It's a shame that you can't feel pain," he commented. "But maybe that's a good thing, considering the position you are in now."_

_No more words were said as they flew over the land. Upon entering a thick part of a forest, Sesshoumaru landed, but held onto Kikyo firmly as he dragged her along behind him. Soon he stopped in front of a hot spring that lay almost connected to a mountain that towered above them as it ascended into the darkness. He pushed her in front of him, where she fell roughly to the ground._

"_Take off your clothes," he ordered._

_Kikyo merely smiled in disgust._

"_Take off your clothes, or I will rip them apart, and you can journey back completely naked. Your choice." he said._

_Kikyo just didn't care anymore, after all it was not like she was going to feel anything. Let him have his way and maybe then he'll leave me alone, she thought. Standing up straight, in front of him, she first slipped off her haori, and then loosening the bow, she let her hakama's drop to the ground. He watched passively, as her naked body almost glowed in the dull moonlight._

"_What are you waiting for?" she asked in a dead tone._

"_Get into the spring," he ordered, ignoring her question._

_She turned around, walked towards the spring, and eased her self into the water. She turned to look at him, but then her eyes widened as she watched him unsheathe his sword._

"_What are you doing?" she asked a little nervously, half wondering what kind of unimaginable sex game he was planning to indulge in._

_Tenseiga pulsed to life and glowed in a brilliant blue aura._

_Suddenly the water that Kikyo was in began bubbling, turning an odd green color and then glowing with some strange power. She looked with fear at Sesshoumaru's expressionless face. He stepped forward and raised his sword above his head, and suddenly something pulled Kikyo deep into the pool. Kikyo's eyes remained open, as she struggled to get free from the invisible force that was dragging her to a black bottom, and watched Sesshoumaru's sword radiate energy as he plunged its blade into the pool. Kikyo felt her miko powers falter and then she stopped her struggling as darkness enveloped her…_

…_ooo…_

_Slowly eyes fluttered open, to see the night sky, and then the dark forest to the left. Kikyo remained motionless until she heard his voice._

"_Get dressed," the cold indifferent voice ordered._

_Kikyo sat up to feel a chill pass down her body. She froze as she realized that she had just **felt **the cold. She felt her naked body, and listened to her heart pound in her chest. Her body had been returned to her along with a complete soul?_

_She finally turned her head to look at Sesshoumaru, who was standing several feet away, looking up at the sky._

"_How?" She uttered in a weak voice._

_Sesshoumaru turned to look at her. She looked all the more weak now that her body had life again, and it irritated him._

"_Tenseiga and the magical spring," was all he offered as an answer._

_Several moments went by._

"_Why?" she questioned finally, confusion biting away at her._

_He glanced at her with amusement this time._

"_Because the sword wanted it to be so," was his simple answer._

"_Why?" she asked again, looking straight into his eyes; looking for a trace of dishonesty._

"_I know not," he answered truthfully._

_Then he took her back to the camp._

…_ooo…_

Kikyo froze in her tracks when her senses alerted her of something.

"Inuyasha, what are you doing here?" she asked in hate and anger, from the figure that appeared before her. "Shouldn't you be with Kagome?"

"I.. I .. just wanted to know how you were doing." he stammered unable to find the right words, if there were any.

"As you can plainly see Inuyasha, I am doing fine." she said, her usual but now unfitting dead tone coming back.

Inuyasha looked uncomfortably at the floor of the forest. "I… I miss you." he said after a while.

"Why would you miss me?" she asked, barely masking the scorn in her voice. "You have Kagome do you not?"

"I do," he said. "But… I still care for you Kikyo. I can never stop caring for you."

"Go back Inuyasha, or your mate will think that you are unfaithful to her." Kikyo said.

Inuyasha looked at her with sorrow very visible in his eyes. "I'm sorry Kikyo."

"For what?" she asked.

"For... hurting you," he said softly.

"You hurt me, a long time ago Inuyasha, or at least I thought it was you." Kikyo said turning to look away from him. "You can't hurt me anymore even if you wanted to."

"What are you going to do now?" he asked gently.

"I am a miko, I am immortal. I will go where I am needed," she simply said.

"You can come back to Kaede's village with me," he offered or rather, pleaded.

"And what… share a hut with you and Kagome?" she asked angrily turning to face him.

"I.. I'm sorry," Inuyasha apologized, not knowing exactly what he was apologizing for, but he knew there were so many things.

"Inuyasha, stop apologizing… go home…" Kikyo said walking past him.

"Good bye... Kikyo…" he uttered almost in a whisper, before bounding away, back to his mate.

Kikyo froze. He had said it; 'Good Bye'. She knew that that was the end. Immediately she felt that her anger and hatred was justified. After all, he had left her, just simply left her. But was she really thinking about Inuyasha…?

Kikyo continued on, hoping that she might come across a village soon, so that she could take rest for the night. Her living breathing body now required rest and attention.

Like a storm unleashed, she suddenly felt a very powerful Youkai aura nearby. Her knees became weak as she recognized that definitive power.

The aura was now flooding her miko senses, ringing all kinds of alarms.

"Still in love with the half breed?" a cool voice asked from behind her.

Kikyo's rapid heart beat began slowing down, and she dropped her bow and her quiver of arrows.

"Have you lost your fear of me miko?" another question flowed out from his mouth.

"I never feared you demon!" Kikyo cut off, in a cold and indifferent voice.

"I thought I changed that the last time we were out in the forest alone," he remarked dryly.

"No, you just gave me life that night, nothing more." she remarked in turn, her cold tone refusing to break for a second.

"Nothing more…?" he repeated questioningly. "You were expecting something more than what I already gave you?"

She didn't answer.

"What do you want Sesshoumaru?" she finally questioned as the silence drew on.

"What makes you think I would want anything?" he asked.

Kikyo flinched. It was almost the same question he had asked her that night.

"Why else are you here?" she asked.

"These are my lands," he informed coolly.

"I… didn't know," Kikyo said, her indifferent tone almost breaking.

"And if you did, you wouldn't have come?" he asked in a tone that indicated a slight hint of amusement.

"That's not what I meant!" she shouted, without knowing why.

In an instant, she was backed in to a tree, clawed fingers holding her firmly around her soft -neck.

"Do not raise your voice to me bitch." he said glaring into her eyes.

"Didn't you forget the word 'dead', before, 'bitch'…?" she asked.

He blinked twice.

"You are not dead anymore," he informed, irritated.

"But that doesn't make a difference to you does it?" she asked, her grip on his arm tightening in an effort to make him release the grip on her neck.

He blinked three times.

"And why should it?" he asked.

"I suppose it shouldn't," she said more to herself than to him.

Kikyo stopped struggling and let her arms drop to her side, turning away from his cold piercing gaze.

"You know, you can be a real bastard," she said spitefully, looking at the darkened forest.

In a flash, she was tossed into the air and she landed with a slight thud on the soft forest floor.

Kikyo seemed startled for a moment, but then looked up to glare at Sesshoumaru.

"You haven't changed one bit have you?" she spat out venomously.

"And you still haven't learnt to show me respect have you?" Sesshoumaru bit back as he slowly approached her fallen figure.

Kikyo laid her head back down on the grass and followed his movements with her eyes. "Why should I respect you when you don't respect me?"

Her voice had lost its sharp edge, and the question was asked with seriousness that he simply could not fathom.

"And what made you incorrectly assume that I do not respect you?" he questioned, with a slight tilt of his head.

"Hhm! If you respected me you wouldn't treat me like this!" Kikyo answered heatedly, looking away from him. "And if you respected me… _you wouldn't have left me_…"

The last few words came out in barely a whisper, but Sesshoumaru heard it clearly and it did nothing but make him frown slightly in confusion.

"Left you…?" he repeated questioningly, straightening his neck.

Kikyo closed her eyes and refused to look at him, or respond to his question.

Sesshoumaru stared at her prone form before he smirked knowingly and a small smile tugged at his lips. He quickly slipped back into his indifferent facade and knelt down next to her.

"You did not want me to leave you…?" he asked, mildly amused.

She uttered not a word and kept her silence.

Sesshoumaru however was unwilling to be ignored, and so he took hold of her chin and turned her face towards him.

"You will not ignore this Sesshoumaru when I am talking to you," he warned without a trace of anger. It was more of a statement than an order. "And you will answer my question."

That was perhaps, Kikyo decided quite surely, an order. But that didn't mean that she'd follow it.

She swatted his hand away from her face before sitting up, unintentionally falling into his half embrace as he remained kneeling next to her.

For a moment there, something within her rippled and, she was briefly tempted to lean against him- hoping that he'd allow it, and even better yet, hoping that he'd reciprocate the action. But she didn't give in to temptation. She would only be setting herself up for a fall, if she did. He had left her, and he would do so again. She didn't doubt it.

Sesshoumaru inwardly frowned as he saw the play of emotions across her face as she, for a brief few moments, hesitated between remaining in the embrace that she had put herself in, and escaping it. He decided to make the choice for her; after all, he wanted answers- and he always got what he wanted.

Kikyo was startled when Sesshoumaru's fury pelt suddenly sprang to life, and wrapped itself around her, effectively binding her hands, that lay on either side of her, against her body, rendering her unable to move except for whatever movement she may attempt with her feet.

"Let me GO!" she glared defiantly at him, not appreciating in the least the position the powerful Inu Youkai put her in.

"In due time," Sesshoumaru told her off handedly, watching with amusement at how her earthen brown orbs flickered in accordance with her rising anger. He decided to add to his words, just to see her get angry a little bit more. "If I so see fit to do so…"

His words had the desired affect as her miko aura snapped at his own, mirroring the anger she felt towards him.

"Now," he silenced her next burst of outrage before she even contemplated it, knowing it would surely come, and looked her dead in the eye, hiding his amusement- for the moment at least. "This Sesshoumaru will not repeat himself- answer my question."

Kikyo tried to break away from his burning golden gaze but found out she couldn't. She wanted to be held by them more than she wanted to be free of him. She didn't know why he would do this to her; ask her to admit to something just so that he could laugh about it right in her face. Why couldn't he stay gone? Why did she have to meet him again? Sure, she hoped that they would. No! She had _prayed_ that they would. But, it seemed that only a part of her prayers were answered. He was here, but he was not here _for her_. And it hurt to know that: to know that he thought of her as nothing more than a source of amusement- something to toy with. What else could she possibly mean to him? She was a human; _a human who had found herself in love with him_, but just a human all the same.

He was so close to her now, yet so very far away. She could never reach him. She could never have him. She could never see her feelings returned by him. She couldn't even touch him without either finally allowing the damn to break and sob through for an eternity, or just pushing him further away- out of her reach- never to be able to claim him as hers and only hers, and perhaps, one day, have to watch from afar as a beautiful demoness completed the seal and banished her away to a world without him.

So why not accept that fate now, instead of foolishly hoping for a miracle that would never come? Why not just give him what he wanted; amusement at her expense, and be done with it- so that she wouldn't have to keep drowning herself in the depths of her feelings for him the longer he was around her?

"_Yes_," she admitted, giving in to her pain, hoping it wouldn't last too long. "I didn't want you to leave."

His next question was one she expected, but hoped against hope that he wouldn't ask. His question would unravel everything about her, if she answered. All that she kept hidden would be secrets no more. But, she thought, perhaps it would help her to move on, even with the voices inside her head saying that that was about as likely as the sun turning blue like the moon.

"Because…" she dragged, hoping that the further she delayed, the less he would want her answer. But, in the end, there was no avoiding it. "_I Love You…_"

She finally said it. And here it comes, she thought, crushing her own heart as best she could, before his taunts and his insults, for even daring to say such a thing to him, could do the job for her.

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened at her outright confession. He certain that she had some pathetic human feelings for him, and thus his reason to torture her a little about it, but to actually hear those three words: It shook him to the core. He tried to deny it. After all, how could he feel anything merely by a human's admittance of her love for him? It was simply not possible. But then, why was his hand already reaching for her forlorn face. Why was his inner demon growling dangerously, gnawing at him to hold her, to make her theirs?

No! He had to stop this now! She must be using some sort of spell, surely. That had to be it. However, amidst his internal struggle and confusion, his hand had already cupped the side of her face and turned her towards him… and now, she was staring straight at him, unshed tears hiding themselves well behind her brown eyes.

_All that time ago_, she was something that sparked his curiosity. It always appeared to him that she was searching for something, something she could not find. And he knew all about that. For centuries, he too was searching for that 'something', never knowing what it was. He found, to his surprise, that he could relate to her. And that only sparked his curiosity about her, even more. So he had studied her, watched her, tried to unravel her before she could do it herself; even with everyone watching him. And before he knew it, she had laid claim to the majority of his thoughts. He found himself not only intrigued by her, but also simply unable to focus on anything else but her.

Apparently, his sword had felt this, and it wasn't too long before it called to him, telling him about the spring and what it could do to the miko. He had of course refused, but the adamant sword saw to it that he did it whether he liked to or not.

But after her resurrection, so to speak, she ever so slowly became less and less of an interest to him. She had lost that inner turmoil within her. And when she stopped searching for whatever it was that she had been looking for, which was the initial cause of his interest in her, he got bored. Soon Naraku had been destroyed, and he had left, and of course, as she had so well pointed put; _left her_ behind.

Now here she was, trying to claim his attention again. But as he burrowed down into those soft earthen eyes, he saw the reason why she had stopped searching, why she had overcome her inner turmoil… why she wasn't lost and wandering anymore. She had found it, and in her eyes he saw what it was, as her two, almost black, eyes, reflected the crescent moon- the crescent moon that _he_ bore on his forehead. She had found it. She had found _him_.

And when in a moment of weakness, she threw herself at him, wrapped her arms around his waist and began to cry… and he allowed her to, and as he pulled her closer to his body, he knew that, after so many centuries, he had _found it_ as well.

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Author's **_bottom_**Corner**

SO! How many liked it and how many want a sequel? Well, I'm probably going to write a sequel even if you don't want me to: just not sure when though. The next chapter of 'Sesshoumaru – The Path to Destiny'- (dang that's long!), will come up tomorrow. And guys… one more thing: REVIEW! Mwahah ahaha hahhah. (I think Enigmatic Arsenic's evil laughter is rubbing off on me- not that I didn't already have one mind you.) – lol. (_Just kidding E.A. – if you're reading this that is. ) Mwahah ahaha hahah (cough!) (cough!) …(choke!)_


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